

Mystery Mayhem Day 7
#21 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:49 PM
#22 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:49 PM
#23 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:50 PM
DARKMOBIUS0010, on 02 November 2014 - 08:48 PM, said:
Thumbs up for the Conan reference. +1
#24 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:58 PM
#25 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:58 PM

If I only had a Baneblade....
#26 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:58 PM
Never trust the lily pads.
#27 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:58 PM
As I make my way to the door I hear an awful squeal.... Oh my F@$! , it's Manbearpig!
He charges me and I narrowly escape his tusks. I quickly spin around and bonk him with my lava lamp. Thud! He's out cold, for now. I gather myself and bolt for the door.
#28 Posted 02 November 2014 - 06:58 PM
#29 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:00 PM
#30 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:00 PM
Blocking the exit is an Undercooked Bacon golem. We all know how much I can't stand undercooked bacon. It's each appendage is draped with the white-yellowy strands of unaffected pork fat. Marbly pink stripes of meat interlaced with the excessive chub seem to taunt with motions that look like flexing and posturing. We both know this bacon intends to make a BLT out of me. I toss the plunger to the side (this would have been my day 6 weapon, had I not missed the time window) and pull my trusty fying pan from my back pocket. Lighting the floorboards on fire with a tasty guitar solo, I proceed to drop kick the bacon golem into separate piles of slithering uncooked breakfast meat.
Needless to say, once the air is filled with the savory scent of properly cooked bacon, I continue to eat my way out of the tasty predicament. My platoon was crucial in finishing off the rest of the red meat. On the way home, I think out loud about how no one's ever going to believe us.
#31 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:02 PM
In front of the doors stands a warrior in power armor, not unsimiliar to my own. The battered form of his MK. III Eisen is coloured like dry blood and inscribed with thousands of small markings. A demonic face inside a 8 pointed star is etched into his shoulder pauldrons and the eye lenses of his helmet glow in a deep orange. A Word Bearer. A member of the XVIIth legion who fell first and got corrupted beyond believe. His sight fills me with disgust and hatred. Weak fanatics, not worthy of the title of a space marine... "I have awaited your coming, son of Night Haunter" he growls "Join us, brother, and embrace the power of the true gods!" His helmet deforms in a disgusting fashion, shaping itself into a crazed metal mask with a horn sticking out where his left eye had just been. Without further hesitation I grip my chain glaive and activate the power supply of my weapon. I lunge forwards, the humming blade aimed square at where his twin hearts should be. With a sick cracking noise his armor brakes and my chain glaive tears deep within his deformed body, ripping the black rotten remains of his hearts to pieces. The metal mask of his face twists into a surprised and horrified stare while his mouth forms incoherent syllables and his hand desperately tries to reach up to me from the ground. I rip my glaive free and start heading for the huge doors that will lead me out of this place. Before finally stepping out into the light I turn around to the dying Word Bearer and hiss "We aren't brothers and we never were, our path is that of hatred, not corruption. Ave Dominus Nox!" and with that final insult I leave the building.
(yes I went way overboard, I know )
Since the dawn of man, unintelligent people have been unable to recognize their own inadequacies, therefore anything that doesn't happen exactly how they imagined it would must be the fault of someone else.
We have come for you, puny humans. Soon the tortured cries of your worthless brethren will fill the air all around you and as the last hour of your pitiful existence draws near you will face the final truth: You will not see a new dawn. There is no peace among the stars, no chosen ones that get spared but only an eternity of pain and slaughter and the mocking laughter of cruel gods.
#32 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:02 PM
I too found a giant killer slug and tried my rocket launcher. "That one bounced!". How could it be?! Fear falls over me with a veil of darkness closing in. Will this be my last breath? It's a dire time. Is the hero going to make it out? Only Lady Fortune knows for sure...
Then I remember I'm from the Pacific NW... we deal with slugs all the time! I run to the kitchen for SALT and a generous application to the slug. With a quick maneuver around the now bubbling mass of goo, I make my way through the door and moonwalk to the glorious sunlight for safety. It's been a long journey... time for Skittles and Taco Bell!
Git gud here: bit.ly/tankguide (I should read this). On Track list.
8000 is better than 11090 - shaunw2010
#33 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:03 PM
#34 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:04 PM
i step to the door and their is a pack of rabid Chihuahuas i kick them all out of my way and i step through the day and i realize i have made it i survived mystery mayhem.

#35 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:05 PM
Edited by x1onexxWarriorx, 02 November 2014 - 07:05 PM.
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#36 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:06 PM


#37 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:10 PM
Edited by MtOMajorCat0311, 02 November 2014 - 07:11 PM.
It is in vain that you think that victory can be achieved by using "people's meat." Victory is achieved through the art of combat. War is waged with skill, not with people's lives.
#38 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:11 PM
#39 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:14 PM
My Garage: T1E6-X, T2 Light, Locust, Pz.Kpfw. S35 739 (f), FCM36 Pak.40, Crusader, T14, M41, Pz.Kpfw. V/IV, ELC AMX, 105 leFH1882, T-34, Churchill III, AMX 12 t, A-43, A-44, RHM.-Borsig Waffentrager, Object 416, Waffentrager auf Pz. IV
Mastery Ace Tanker Badges: Covenanter, T1 Heavy tank, Churchill III, Waffentrager auf Pz. IV, Pz. Sfl. IVc, AMX 12t, A-20, T-34, A-43, FCM36 Pak.40, A-44
Grinding:AMX 12t, Object 416, Crusader
#40 Posted 02 November 2014 - 07:14 PM
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